Time Off, Still On: How to Show Up for Your Kids When You’re Exhausted

You’re Cooked, Still in the Game

There are days (or weeks) when your brain feels like it’s running Windows 95 and your body’s one more coffee away from collapse. Work’s been relentless, sleep’s a myth, and your mental load has its own postcode. Still, those little faces want your attention. You love them. You just wish you could love them lying down.

Presence Over Performance

Let’s get one thing straight: showing up doesn’t mean putting on a show. You don’t need to build a fort, plan a treasure hunt, or run a backyard Olympics. Being in the same room, phone down, brain semi-engaged, is enough. Kids notice when you’re present, even if you’re horizontal.

“The simple act of being present with your child, even in moments of your own exhaustion, builds resilience and deepens their sense of security."

 Dr. Susan Newman, Psychologist

Low-Energy Dadding Ideas (Weeknight Edition)

• “You choose; I cruise.” Hand them the remote or the book and say, “You pick, I’ll hang.” No effort, just vibes.

• Mid-scroll snack break. Grab two spoons, one tub of yoghurt or ice cream, and sit next to them and just let them do the chatting, keep listening, no matter how random.

• Quiet-Off Challenge. “Let’s see who can sit quietly the longest. Loser puts the dishes away.” Spoiler: You both win.

• Narrate your burnout. “I’m wiped. Wanna lie here with me like bored sea lions?” Weirdly effective.

• Let them help with your wind-down. “I need a recharge. Will you bring me a pillow and hang here a bit?”

Nothing fancy. Just things that let them know you're around - and still theirs.

The Magic of Bare Minimum Effort

Your kid doesn’t always need a superhero. They just need you, showing up in small, repeatable ways. A quick chat. A side hug. A comment on their drawing that sounds vaguely interesting. This is the glue of connection, not the grand gesture.

You Can Rest and Still Show Up

Resting doesn’t make you a bad dad. It makes you human. You can close your eyes for ten minutes and still hold space for your kid when they plonk themselves next to you. You can say, "Mate, I’m knackered but I’m glad you’re here." That’s not a weakness. That’s modelling.

DADDING IN ACTION

Run a 'Quiet-Off' after dinner tonight. The first one to speak does the dishes. 

Resources:

1. Raising Good Humans by Dr. Aliza Pressman A podcast offering practical support for parents to show up even when tired. [Raising Good Humans – (Podcast) | Dr. Aliza Pressman]

   
   

2. How to Raise Kids Who Aren't Assholes by Melinda Wenner MoyerA science-based guide promoting simple, meaningful parenting over perfection. [How to Raise Kids Who Aren't Assholes – (Book) | Melinda Wenner Moyer]

   
   

3. The Good Inside with Dr. Becky

   Podcast on being a “good enough” parent with tips for low effort, loving presence. [Good Inside – (Podcast) | Dr. Becky Kennedy]