How To Talk About Online Safety (Without Killing the Conversation)

You hand over a screen, and suddenly you're not just a dad - you're a digital lifeguard trying to stop a rip current you can't even see.

You want to protect your kid. You also don't want to come across like you're suspicious of everything they click. The trick? It's not about having all the right answers. It's about being someone they feel okay coming to - especially when things get messy online.

"The quality of your relationship is the best online safety tool you have. If kids feel they can come to you without fear, they're more likely to talk when something's wrong."

- Dr. Kristy Goodwin, digital wellbeing researcher

Why It's Worth Having the Conversation (Even If It's Awkward)

You won't always get it right. That's fine. This isn't a performance. It's a relationship.

Kids are curious. The internet's a mess. At some point, they'll see or hear something dodgy. When that happens, the most important thing is that they know you're someone they can come to - not someone who's going to freak out or shut it down.

The conversation doesn't have to be slick. It just has to start.

Conversation Starters That Keep It Chill

Forget the big sit-down. Most of the good chats happen when you're not even trying - on a walk, during a drive, stacking the dishwasher.

Try these:

"What's the weirdest thing someone's messaged you online?"

"Ever seen someone use a fake Insta account?"

 "Do you reckon most people are real on TikTok?"

"What would you do if someone sent something dodgy?"

You're not testing them. You're showing them it's okay to talk about this stuff - even the uncomfortable bits.

What Not To Do

Some moves will shut the whole thing down faster than you can say "MySpace."

• Avoid kicking it off with a lecture or a list of rules

• Stay calm if they tell you something honest

• Skip the nostalgia - no one wants to hear about MSN Messenger

• Don't treat it as a one-off chat - keep the door open

• The goal isn't to interrogate. Just show up.

What To Cover (Without Turning It Into a Lecture)

Keep it low-key. You're checking in, not checking up.

Privacy: What's okay to share and what's best kept private

Gaming chats: Who's on the other side of the headset isn't always who they say they are

Screenshots: Once it's out there, it's out there

Sexting & digital footprints: For older kids, this matters more than they realise

Scams and fake profiles: How to spot them before it gets weird

This isn't about locking down their phone or tracking their every move. It's about being the kind of dad they want to talk to.

Nail that - even some of the time - and you're doing better than you think.

DADDING IN ACTION

Tonight, ask your kid: "If something online ever felt off or made you uncomfortable, do you reckon you'd tell me?"

Resources

Book: Raising Your Child in a Digital World by Dr. Kristy Goodwin

- A grounded, no-fuss guide to parenting in the age of screens

Podcast: The Digital Human - Stories about how tech shapes us, good for curious minds of any age