The Stuff You’ll Never See in a Father’s Day Card

The Bit They Don’t Print in Gold Foil

Father’s Day cards are full of fishing rods, golf clubs, and big bold “World’s Best Dad” claims. Nice sentiments, but they skip the daily grind, the jobs no one claps for, the invisible skills you’ve somehow mastered, the gross stuff you cop without complaint.

That’s the real fatherhood: the little, unglamorous moments that prove you’re holding the whole thing together.

“A lot of the emotional labour and invisible effort dads put in goes unnoticed. But these everyday actions are the glue that makes family life work.”

 Dr Tim Hawkes, Educator and Parenting Author

12 Things You’ll Never See in a Father’s Day Card

1. You’re the Dog Poo Removal Specialist

No one thanks you for scraping cleats before school drop-off. Yet there you are, knife in hand, saving the car interior from smelling like a swamp.

2. You’re the Spider Whisperer

Every eight-legged intruder is your department. Doesn’t matter if it’s tiny or terrifying, you’re expected to remove it calmly while everyone else screams.

3. You Brave the Sideline Storms

Your coffee’s cold, the rain is sideways, and the scoreboard reads 12–0. Still, you clap and yell encouragement like it’s the AFL Grand Final.

4. You Eat the “Creative” Cooking

Undercooked cupcakes? Pasta that tastes like glue? You shovel it in with a grin, because feelings matter more than flavour.

5. You Fix Stuff Before Mum Notices

Broken toys, leaky taps, squeaky hinges, solved before anyone realises. You’re basically a silent handyman ninja.

6. You Pretend the Craft is Genius

It’s glue, glitter, and a vaguely balloon-shaped object. But you hang it on the fridge like it belongs in the National Gallery.

7. You Know Bin Night Without Checking

No one else remembers. You do. Every week. The garbage truck driver should probably send you a thank-you card.

8. You’re the 2am Noise Investigator

Every mystery thud in the night? That’s your cue to stumble through the house, half-asleep, cricket bat in hand, ready to confront… the cat.

9. You Hold the Torch Wrong (and Proud)

You’ll never point it where anyone wants. Straight in their eyes? Yep. On the ceiling? Of course. It’s part of the tradition.

10. You’re the Family Jungle Gym

Your back may never recover, but you’re still the kids’ favourite trampoline. Their laughter makes it (almost) worth the chiropractor bill.

11. You Survive the Flat-Pack Gauntlet

“Easy 15-minute setup” turns into a three-hour, sweat-filled saga with missing screws. But you get it standing, eventually.

12. You Laugh at Terrible Jokes

Knock-knock with no punchline. You chuckle anyway. Because your kid’s joy is worth every bad gag.

None of this stuff will ever be printed on a Father’s Day card. But it’s what really makes you Dad. The unglamorous, unseen, often ridiculous jobs - the ones that make your family’s world run smoothly.

So here’s your reminder: you’re already doing the work that matters, even if Hallmark never notices.

DADDING IN ACTION

Make your own “real card”: list three thankless dad jobs and have a laugh.

Resources:

1. Be a Great Dad: A Practical Guide to Confident Fatherhood for Dads Old and New by Andrew Watson

   Offers straightforward, practical, and sympathetic advice for all the challenges dads face, including bonding and balancing work and family.

   Be a Great Dad – Kenny’s Bookshop

   
   

2. Imperfect Parenting: Connection Over Perfection by Brittney Serpell Focuses on authoritative parenting that embraces imperfection, helping parents build strong connections rather than stressing over perfect parenting.

   Imperfect Parenting – American Psychological Association

   
   

3. Sober Dad: The Manual For Perfectly Imperfect Fatherhood by Michael Graubart

   A practical guide merging fatherhood with sobriety, emphasizing presence and authenticity over perfection.

   Book Review of Sober Dad